The Devil's Dictionary - Examples

Examples

Conservative
(n.) A statesman who is enamoured of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to replace them with others.
Cynic
(n.) A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. Hence the custom among the Scythians of plucking out a cynic's eyes to improve his vision.
Gas meter
(n.) The family liar in the basement.
Lawyer
(n.) One skilled in circumvention of the law.
Marriage
(n.) A household consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
Religion
(n.) A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
Youth
(n.) The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer.
Youth is the true Saturnian Reign, the Golden Age on earth again, when figs are grown on thistles, and pigs betailed with whistles and, wearing silken bristles, live ever in clover, and cows fly over, delivering milk at every door, and Justice is never heard to snore, and every assassin is made a ghost and, howling, is cast into Baltimost! —Polydore Smith

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Famous quotes containing the word examples:

    No rules exist, and examples are simply life-savers answering the appeals of rules making vain attempts to exist.
    André Breton (1896–1966)

    It is hardly to be believed how spiritual reflections when mixed with a little physics can hold people’s attention and give them a livelier idea of God than do the often ill-applied examples of his wrath.
    —G.C. (Georg Christoph)

    In the examples that I here bring in of what I have [read], heard, done or said, I have refrained from daring to alter even the smallest and most indifferent circumstances. My conscience falsifies not an iota; for my knowledge I cannot answer.
    Michel de Montaigne (1533–1592)