Internal Examination

Famous quotes containing the words internal and/or examination:

    Well designed, fully functional infant. Provides someone to live for as well as another mouth to feed. Produces cooing, gurgling and other adorable sounds. May cause similar behavior in nearby adults. Cries when hungry, sleepy or just because. Hand Wash with warm water and mild soap, then pat dry with soft cloth and talc. Internal mechanisms are self-cleaning... Two Genders: Male. Female. Five Colors: White. Black. Yellow. Red. Camouflage.
    Alfred Gingold, U.S. humorist. Items From Our Catalogue, “Baby,” Avon Books (1982)

    Maybe it’s understandable what a history of failures America’s foreign policy has been. We are, after all, a country full of people who came to America to get away from foreigners. Any prolonged examination of the U.S. government reveals foreign policy to be America’s miniature schnauzer—a noisy but small and useless part of the national household.
    —P.J. (Patrick Jake)