List of Viz Comic Strips - F - J

J

• Farmer Palmer – a paranoid, money-grubbing farmer whose catch phrase is "Get orf moi laaaand!"
• Father McFiddly – "he Loves Diddling Kiddies" about the wacky antics of a priest trying to peek up the altar-boys' cassocks, etc. A skit on the Catholic sex abuse cases scandal.
• The Fat Slags – two enormous and tarty women living in Mansfield - San (Sandra Burke) and Tray (Tracey Tunstall) with huge appetites for both sex and food—starred in a spinoff cartoon and a live-action movie.
• Fat Sod – a one-off greedy character who steals a large pie from the windowsill of one Farmer Palmer (possibly the same character described above, despite physical dissimilarity), only to be ruthlessly shot dead and baked in a pie by Palmer, who hides inside the false pie initially stolen to do so.
• Father Christmas – a man so obsessed with Christmas he believes that it is the festive season in the middle of August.
• Fatty and Skinny, Susannah and Trinny – A strip portraying Susannah Constantine and Trinny Woodall as school bullies who ridicule classmates for their unfashionable clothes, only to end each cartoon forced to wear a horrendously uncomfortable outfit for detention or gym class. This strip prompted legal action from Woodall and Constantine themselves.
• Felix and his Amazing Underpants – a boy with underpants which he believes have amazing powers. They are in fact completely ordinary, albeit being a bizarrely large size.
• Ferdinand the Foodie – self-proclaimed culinary expert and restaurant critic.
• Finbarr Saunders and his double entendres – a boy with a good ear for homophones. The strip almost always revolves around his liaisons with his neighbour, Mr Gimlet, whose manner of speech is always interpreted by Finbarr as graphically sexual in nature (in fact, it is deliberately scripted this way), usually when Gimlet is reminiscing about everyday situations with Saunder's mother. However, at the end of each strip, Mr Gimlet and Finbarr's mother invariably do end up having sex and make blatantly obvious verbal references to their doing so, but Finbarr interprets these as being nothing untoward. Finbarr's creator, Simon Thorp, described the character as a cross between a small boy and Sid Boggle (Sid James) from Carry On Camping.
• Friar Fuck – a monk with Tourette syndrome.
• Fru T. Bunn – a "Master Baker" who makes his own sex dolls out of gingerbread and then attempts to have sex with them.
• George Best is a Cinema Pest – a one-off strip featuring the late George Best prematurely disclosing the final twists of notable movies such as The Sixth Sense and The Usual Suspects to incensed cinema goers.
• George Bestial – a George Best lookalike that, as his name implies, enjoys committing bestiality.
• Gilbert Ratchet – a boy who can invent anything, usually to solve people's bizarre "problems" as he comes across them. However, his inventions invariably cause far more problems of their own. Usually the entire premise of the strip turns out to be a highly contrived misunderstanding. Gilbert's creator, Davey Jones, describes the character as "like (the Dandy's) Screwy Driver—only with more genital mutilation of vicars".
• Goldfish Boy – a schoolboy who lives in a goldfish bowl.
• Grassy Knollington – schoolboy conspiracy theorist.
• Helpful Herbert A boy whose good deeds always land him in big trouble.
• Hector the collector and his metal detector strips about a boy named Hector who finds big & small things with his metal detector in one strip he found a key that according to a passing rich man opened up a key to a chest with gold inside and gave him £500 the character later returned in the 3oth edition comic
• Hugh Phemism is unable to communicate in anything other than circumlocutory language, leading to predictable misunderstandings..
• Ivan Jelical – an evangelistic fundamentalist Christian, whose proselytising is spectacularly unsuccessful.
• Ivor the Skiver – his dad's a bad driver.
• Jack Black – a young amateur detective who gets people arrested for minor technical transgressions. The first strip was apparently 'traced by Chris Donald', according to fellow Viz cartoonist Davey Jones, 'out of an old copy of Whizzer and Chips'. As the strip has progressed, Jack has been increasingly portrayed as a racist and a xenophobe among other major faults.
• Jellyhead – The girl with no brain. A one off superhero parody about a girl born with lime jelly instead of a brain. Jellyhead spends her entire time in this story in a catatonic state, yet still manages to foil an armed robbery. The one-off strip was the work of Charlie Higson.
• Jimmy Hill – The bespectacled and bearded television presenter.
• Joe Robinson Crusoe - a thinly disguised parody of flamboyant Newcastle pub and nightclub operator Joe Robertson.
• Johnny Fartpants – a boy afflicted with extreme flatulence. Tagline: There's always a commotion in his trousers.
• Jump Jet Fanny and her Hawker-Siddeley Twat – A woman who can perform VTOL (vertical take-off and landing) with her vagina.