Cast
- Samuel L. Jackson as Narrator
- Bob Saget as Carl
- Christina Applegate as Melissa
- Jamie Kennedy as Jamie
- David Koechner as Melvin
- Harvey Fierstein as Sheila
- Lewis Black as Jimmy
- Whoopi Goldberg as Helen
- Mo'Nique as Vicky
- Tracy Morgan as Marcus
- Mario Cantone as Sidney
- Carlos Mencia as Juan Sanchez
- Lori Loughlin as Melvin smacking penguin
- Dane Cook as Online penguin
- Jason Alexander as Penguin on belly
- Jason Biggs as Insecure penguin
- Norm Crosby as Carl's grandfather
- Norm Macdonald as Join Twosomes penguin
- Jonathan Katz as Steve the Owl
- Brie Larson as "I need a Z-pack" penguin
- James Belushi as "They're all bitches" penguin
- Dave Coulier as "There's no snow" penguin
- John Stamos as "What's global warming?" penguin
- Jodie Sweetin as "He's so gross" penguin
- Jon Lovitz as "My eyes are up here" penguin
- Gilbert Gottfried as "I'm freezing my nuts off!" penguin
- Damon Wayans as "Hey, that's my ass!" penguin
- Abe Vigoda as Penguin from Boca
- Alyson Hannigan as Hottie penguin
- Jonathan Silverman as Seal critics
- Scott Weinger (uncredited) as Horny penguin
Read more about this topic: Farce Of The Penguins
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—Bible: Hebrew Psalm XLII (l. XLII, 11)
“I have a notion that gamblers are as happy as most people, being always excited; women, wine, fame, the table, even ambition, sate now & then, but every turn of the card & cast of the dice keeps the gambler alive—besides one can game ten times longer than one can do any thing else.”
—George Gordon Noel Byron (1788–1824)