Childhood
Emma Hayden Gilham was born in 1855 in Lexington, Virginia in Rockbridge County. She was the daughter of Major William Gilham, Commandant of Cadets and an instructor at Virginia Military Institute (VMI), one of 7 children he had with his wife Cordelia Adelaide (née Hayden) Gilham. Her father was assisted at VMI by a younger teacher who was to become one of the more famous Confederate leaders, Thomas J. Jackson, better known as Stonewall Jackson.
In 1860, Major Gilham prepared a well-known training manual for recruits and militia at the request of Virginia Governor Henry A. Wise. It was entitled Manual of Instruction for the Volunteers and Militia of the United States and was initially published in Philadelphia. As the American Civil War broke out the following year, he was involved with early training of cadets at Camp Lee (also known as New Fairgrounds, or Camp of Instruction) in Richmond, Virginia. In June, 1864, Emma's childhood home on the campus of VMI was burned during a raid led by Union General David Hunter. The house, a campus landmark, was later rebuilt to original specifications after the War.
After the War ended in 1865, William Gilham became president of fertilizer company in Richmond. Emma spent her teen-aged years at Richmond, where she was a débutante at one of Richmond's earliest "Germans", which were formal social gatherings for the young people (the name of these events had no relationship to Germany). She was the sister of Julius Hayden Gilham (April 6, 1852–March 10, 1936) who also buried in Hollywood Cemetery in Richmond, Virginia.
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