Discipline
Attachment parents seek to understand the biological and psychological needs of the child, and to avoid unrealistic expectations of child behavior. In setting age-appropriate boundaries and limits, attachment parenting takes into account the physical and psychological stage of development that the child is currently experiencing. In this way, parents may seek to avoid frustration that occurs when they expect things beyond the child's capability. According to Arnall (2007), discipline means teaching the child by gentle guidance, using tools such as re-direction, natural consequences, listening and modeling, rather than punitive means such as spanking, time-out, grounding, and punitive consequences.
Attachment parenting holds that it is vital to the child's survival that they are capable of communicating their needs to adults, and to have those needs promptly met. This does not mean meeting a need that a child can fulfill itself, nor (argues Dr Sears) is it necessarily open to exploitation by children; while still an infant, says Dr Sears, a child is mentally incapable of outright manipulation.
Rather, the focus is on identifying unmet needs and responding appropriately. APs are encouraged to understand what these needs are, when they arise, how they change over time and circumstances, and how to flexibly devise appropriate responses. AP proponents establish these responses by looking at child development and infant and child biology, to determine psychologically and biologically appropriate responses at different stages of development.
Similar practices are called natural parenting, instinctive parenting, intuitive parenting, immersion parenting or continuum concept parenting.
Read more about this topic: Attachment Parenting
Famous quotes containing the word discipline:
“To try to control a nine-month-old’s clinginess by forcing him away is a mistake, because it counteracts a normal part of the child’s development. To think that the child is clinging to you because he is spoiled is nonsense. Clinginess is not a discipline issue, at least not in the sense of correcting a wrongdoing.”
—Lawrence Balter (20th century)
“The discipline of the Old Testament may be summed up as a discipline teaching us to abhor and flee from sin; the discipline of the New Testament, as a discipline teaching us to die to it.”
—Matthew Arnold (1822–1888)
“The first rule of education for me was discipline. Discipline is the keynote to learning. Discipline has been the great factor in my life. I discipline myself to do everything—getting up in the morning, walking, dancing, exercise. If you won’t have discipline, you won’t have a nation. We can’t have permissiveness. When someone comes in and says, “Oh, your room is so quiet,” I know I’ve been successful.”
—Rose Hoffman, U.S. public school third-grade teacher. As quoted in Working, book 8, by Studs Terkel (1973)