The Toucher and Rich Show - Current (98.5) Frequent Bits

Current (98.5) Frequent Bits

• Best of/Worst of Brackets: In this bit, the cast creates March Madness style brackets in order to pit pop culture figures against one another, usually in a field of 16. The most notorious of these bits was the "Worst Comedians" bracket (won by Dane Cook), which garnered international attention from various media outlets and comedy blogs. Other examples include "Worst Sportscaster" (won by Glenn "The Big O" Ordway), "Most Fascinating Person in Boston" (won by The Harvard Square Puppeteer), "Douchiest Douchebag" (won by Spencer Pratt) featuring pick up artist extraordinaire Mystery, Brandon from Incubus, Guy Fieri, and others. "Best Internet Video" (won by The Alabama Leprechaun).
• Dating on Demand: The show analyzes cable company dating videos submitted by less than desirable folks while offering humorous commentary.
• Drunken Celtics/Red Sox recap: a member of the show goes out and interviews drunks outside of stadiums and bars after Celtics and Red Sox games. The first meeting with the Chili Guy came during a drunken Red Sox recap.
• I Rule: A contest similar to the 100,000 Dollar Pyramid. (No longer performed on a regular basis)
• Rich Goes to the Movies: Rich reviews two or three movies in the theaters. The last review is sung to the theme music of Magnum, P.I.
• "New Jack" Edwards: During hockey season, callers attempt to guess what hip hop artist recorded the song Boston Bruins television announcer Jack Edwards is reading the lines from.
• Sports: Crash's sports report. The opening song to the bit is "You're the Best" from the movie The Karate Kid. (No longer a segment due to Crash leaving the station returning to Atlanta.)
• Ward Wednesdays: Boston Bruins veteran defenseman Aaron Ward previously called in to the show during the NHL season to discuss life with the Boston Bruins. Ward has since retired, now works for TSN in Canada .
• White Boy Wednesdays: Every Wednesday Brian Scalabrine of the Boston Celtics calls in (if awake) to talk about everything Celtics/NBA, getting a spray tan and much more. (No longer a segment due to Brian Scalabrine leaving the Celtics and going to the Chicago Bulls.) replaced by Greg Stiemsma "so steamy".
• Would You Buy It: Rich announces the week's new music and DVD releases.
• The Mail Bag: As Fred says "A delightful pun!" Listeners submit messages via the internet to the show and some get played by a computerized voice on the next show.
• Ask a Pink Hat: Adolfo goes out and finds a less-than knowledgeable female fan wearing a pink Red Sox cap and asks her basic questions about the Red Sox. Adapted for the Boston Bruins after their 2011 Stanley Cup Finals victory over the Vancouver Canucks and entitled, "Ask a Bruins Pink Hat."
• Faster Guy: An heir-apparent to the Chilli Guy, the Faster Guy is a well-meaning, mid-western-accented, pop-music loving hang-about that frequently runs into Adolfo outside the TD Garden and Fenway Park as the latter collects drunken recaps. The Faster Guy is known to favor non-sequiturs ("Ground beef is really a winner nowadays") and has various theories about the qualities that make up a good sports team ("left-handedness", for example, is a highly desirable athletic quality). The best attribute anything can have, of course, is the simple ability to go "faster", which in the Faster Guy's eyes cures many of life's ills. The crowning moment of a Faster Guy segment is usually when he finally references the word "faster", underscored by a dramatic rendition of "O Fortuna."
• Naughty Massarotti: Tony Massarotti reads Tweets and callers must decide weather they are real or he is making them up. Also used for describing "R-rated sex scenes" from select movies.
• The Jon Gruden "This Guy" Challenge: Played on Tuesdays during the NFL season, Rich compiles the funniest and most ridiculous clips from ESPN NFL analyst Jon Gruden during his commentary of the previous night's Monday Night Football game, and a caller must decide whether or not Gruden will refer to players and/or coaches as "This Guy" during each clip.
• 98-Mile: Various on-air and off-air personalities at 98.5 The Sports Hub compete one on one in a ranked bracketed "rap battle" style tournament to determine who can rap and roast their assigned opponents in the most humorous and cleverest manner. The eventual winner of the contest was Damon Amendolara. Of note there were numerous references to Felger and Massarotti's producer James Stewart having an emotionless personality and fitting the stereotypical profile of a serial murderer. The name of the contest is a reference to the film 8-Mile.
• Thornton Thursdays: Shawn Thornton calls in and reports on the day to day happenings with the Boston Bruins
• What's In Your Stack: Adolfo visits a comic book store on a Tuesday (when new comics are released), to talk to customers about what comics they are buying.