Susan Still (women's Rights Activist) - Life and Domestic Abuse

Life and Domestic Abuse

Susan Still was born in 1964 in a New York middle-class family. She attended college in Buffalo, New York where she met blues guitarist Ulner Lee Still and fell in love. They married a few years later while Susan supported the family financially by working at a health insurance company. At first, Ulner was controlling but not particularly violent or abusive. According to Susan, he had a will to dominate and the power to brainwash. Her husband eventually isolated Susan from talking to her parents or friends. However, due to her husband's proficiency at manipulation and control, and its gradual increase, Susan was slow to realize the high level of danger in which her husband's domineering behaviors placed her. After giving birth to their oldest children, a boy and a girl, Susan had to quit work and stay home to take care of them. As the family's financial situations deteriorated, Ulner became more physically abusive. It came to a head in 1992 when Ulner struck his wife after she forgot an item when grocery shopping.

In 2002, the family's financial situation continued to worsen as they had another child and their careers became less stable. Susan began working again to singlehandedly support the family while Ulner became increasingly abusive. As Susan found a new confidant in her new employer Lynn Jasper, Ulner became more distrustful. The long-term marriage became shaky and Ulner began to threaten Susan more frequently. Ulner instructed his sons and daughter to call their mother "white slut" (though she is in fact biracial) and on one occasion ordered his son to tape him beating her. He would later play the video tapes to the family during dinner, occasionally pausing, pointing out Susan's flaws, mocking her while justifying his brutal behavior. Employer Jasper soon noticed bruises on Susan's face that she disguised as accidental injuries. Finally in May 2003, Lynn encouraged Susan to escape the household with her two sons after discovering a farewell letter at her office drawer containing words like "If anything should happen to me or if I should turn up missing, it is possible my husband was involved".