Miai - Attitudes

Attitudes

Modern attitudes toward miai have changed significantly. According to an estimate in 1998, ten to thirty per cent of all marriages that took place in Japan during that time were arranged marriages. The National Institute of Population and Social Security Research in 2005 estimates that 6.2% of marriages in Japan are arranged. The younger generation is more apt to adopting the Western philosophy of love where marriage is often preceded by romantic courtship. Romantic love (ren’ai) implies that there are no constraints against selecting individuals whom one can marry. However, it is not always possible to classify a particular marriage as “love” or “arranged” because of parental influence on the candidates. Women are more inclined to seek a romantic relationship than men. Gender enculturation is often seen as the cause for the discrepancy. Women are raised with the expectation that they may only find satisfaction within the home and are therefore perhaps more susceptible to modern brands of idealism, such as that true love will be followed by marital and domestic bliss. There are several methods for meeting potential mates that differ from the structure of the miai. For example, konpa or compa (companion) is a method young people have adopted into modern society. Konpa occurs when groups of four or five boys go out together with the same number of girls to see how they all get along. This method has become more popular since it is highly informal and does not involve parents.