Yahweh or No Way
In this segment, Colbert determines whether various news events were influenced by divine intervention (Yahweh) or run contrary to what he thinks would be God's will (No Way). One example was the news story stating that Mormons may have baptized President Barack Obama's relatives. Colbert labeled this "No Way", explaining that Mormons are teetotalers and Obama uses even the flimsiest excuse to have a beer. Another was the story of Dinosaur Adventureland, a Creationist dinosaur theme park whose owner claimed that he was not required to pay the $600,000 in payroll taxes he owed to the IRS because he was employed by God. Colbert labeled this "Yahweh", and then said that God should not be imagined as He was by Hollywood films such as King of Kings, but more like Mr. Six of the Six Flags television commercials. He also claimed that the manna that fell in the desert was funnel cake. Rarely, Colbert used a "Middle Way' or 'Maybewey, because he was unsure if an event was in "Yahweh or "No Way" territory, or in one case where he refused to take sides, "I Don't Know Weh."
Read more about this topic: Recurring Segments On The Colbert Report