Polyester (film) - Plot

Plot

The life of housewife Francine Fishpaw (Divine) is crumbling around her in her middle-class suburban Baltimore home. Her husband, Elmer (David Samson), is a polyester-clad lout who owns an X-rated theater, causing anti-pornography protesters to picket the Fishpaws' house. She also states that "all the neighborhood women spit at me" whenever she is at the shopping mall. Francine's children are Lu-Lu (Mary Garlington), her spoiled, slutty daughter, and Dexter (Ken King), her delinquent, glue-sniffing son who derives illicit pleasure from stomping on women's feet. Also adding to Francine's troubles is her snobby, class-conscious, cocaine-snorting mother, La Rue (Joni Ruth White), who robs Francine blind and only cares about her "valuable shopping time."

Francine seeks solace in her best friend, Cuddles Kovinsky (Edith Massey), an independently wealthy, simple-minded woman and the world's oldest debutante. Cuddles was once the Fishpaws' housekeeper, but she inherited a large sum of money from a very affluent family that she used to work for, and who has befriended Francine. This infuriates La Rue, who admonishes Francine, "She was a scrubwoman. Give her... car fare...a ham at Easter, but for God's sake, don't hang around with her!" Cuddles tries to cheer Francine with "seize-the-day" bromides, to no avail.

Francine discovers that her husband is having an affair with his secretary, Sandra Sullivan (Mink Stole), and later confronts them during a tryst at a motel and demands a divorce. Francine then falls into alcoholism and depression, exacerbated by her children's behavior: Lu-Lu becomes pregnant by her delinquent boyfriend, Bo-Bo (Stiv Bators), and she tells her mother, "I'm having an abortion, and I can't wait!"; and after Dexter is arrested at a supermarket for stomping on a woman's foot, the media reveal that he's the "Baltimore foot stomper".

Lu-Lu goes to a family planning clinic for an abortion, but is harassed by anti-abortion picketers. She flees, goes home, and tries to induce a miscarriage, causing Francine to call an unwed mothers' home. Two nuns (Mary Vivian Pearce and Sharon Niesp) arrive, cart Lu-Lu out of the house, lock her in the trunk of a car, and take her to a Catholic home for unwed mothers. Meanwhile, on Halloween evening, La Rue is shot by Bo-Bo and his friend, who have come to trash the Fishpaw house. La Rue manages to retrieve the gun and shoots Bo-Bo dead. Lu-Lu comes home from the unwed mothers' home and, upon discovering her dead boyfriend, tries to commit suicide by sticking her head in the oven. Francine comes home, sees her daughter's suicide attempt, and faints. After this, Francine's life begins to change. Dexter is released from jail, completely rehabilitated. Lu-Lu suffers a miscarriage from her suicide attempt and sees the error of her ways, turning from a high-school harlot to an artistic flower child who enthuses, "Look, mother, I've discovered macramé!". Francine finally summons the strength to tell off La Rue. A beacon of light arrives in the form of lounge-suit-wearing, Corvette-driving Todd Tomorrow (Tab Hunter), lifting Francine's spirits. Todd proposes marriage to an elated Francine, who accepts.

However, it is soon revealed that Todd is romantically involved with La Rue and they are conspiring to embezzle Francine's divorce settlement and drive her insane. Meanwhile, Elmer and Sandra break into the house to kill Francine, but are felled by Dexter and Lu-Lu. Dexter steps on Sandra's foot, causing her to accidentally shoot Elmer; Lu-Lu uses her macramé to strangle Sandra. Cuddles and her German chauffeur/fiancé Heintz (Hans Kramm) arrive and drive their limousine into La Rue and Todd. The film concludes with a happy ending for Francine, her children, and Cuddles and Heintz.