Neil Harris (born 12 July 1977) is an English footballer who plays for Southend United as a striker. He is currently Millwall's all-time record goalscorer, with 125 league goals and 138 in all competitions. He broke the previous record of 111 goals, held by Teddy Sheringham, on 13 January 2009, during a 3–2 away win at Crewe Alexandra. He made 432 appearances for the club.
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“Mr. Brownlow: The law supposes that your wife acts under your direction.
Bumble: If that’s what the law supposes, sir, then the law’s an ass. And if that’s the eye of the law, sir, then the law’s a bachelor.”
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