The Good, The Bad, and The Guilty
It is 10:10 p.m., 2 July 1881-a balmy evening in the little Wyoming Territory town of Roadkill. In response to a warm invitation from His Honor, Judge Waylon Payne, you have gathered in his home, beside the courthouse, in the heart of town, for a sumptuous dinner. Dinner will be followed by the hanging of the infamous, formerly elusive Malevolent Seven-a villainous gang of criminals rumored to have secretly victimized your fair territory for many years. Although no one knows the identity of the Malevolent Seven, everyone will find out tonight.
June 19, 1881
My Dearest Friends, In my tireless attempts to rid the town of Roadkill of the villainous scum that is corrupting our citizens, I take pride in announcing the capture of the Malevolent Seven-a dastardly conspiracy of criminals that has secretly victimized our fair territory for far too many years. To celebrate this landmark moment in law enforcement, I have erected eight gallows on Main Street: seven for the execution of this thieving, murderous band, and one for good luck. The execution will take place at midnight on the second of July, to "kick off" festivities for the Fourth of July weekend. As a crowd is expected, I've reserved prime seating for you, my most honored guests and dear friends. You shall be served a sumptuous meal in my home prior to our thrilling main event, which will begin with the hanging of the mysterious masked horseman who masterminded the Seven's unsavory crimes. So, leave your affairs in order, and come join me in this triumphant celebration. The honor of your presence is required.
Sincerely, Waylon Payne
Read more about this topic: How To Host A Murder
Famous quotes containing the words the and/or guilty:
“Wild Bill was indulging in his favorite pastime of a friendly game of cards in the old No. 10 saloon. For the second time in his career, he was sitting with his back to an open door. Jack McCall walked in, shot him through the back of the head, and rushed from the place, only to be captured shortly afterward. Wild Bill’s dead hand held aces and eights, and from that time on this has been known in the West as “the dead man’s hand.””
—State of South Dakota, U.S. public relief program (1935-1943)
“Let no guilty man escape, if it can be avoided.... No personal considerations should stand in the way of performing a duty.”
—Ulysses S. Grant (1822–1885)