Dog Sees God: Confessions of A Teenage Blockhead - Synopsis

Synopsis

CB and CB's sister have a funeral for their dog, who recently contracted rabies and was put down after killing "a little yellow bird" (implied to be Woodstock) and nearly biting CB. Unfortunately, the funeral ends in failure as they argue over who should say a prayer for him. CB then goes to see his pothead friend Van, asking where people go when they die. Van, who claims to be Buddhist, says that spirits either dissolve away or get reincarnated. The next day at school CB asks his friend Matt where we go when we die. Matt gives him a more detailed explanation, proposing that when we die we return to a vagina, similar to being born, although the vagina does not belong to our mother. Beethoven walks by and Matt calls him a fag.

At lunch Marcy and Tricia tell their friends about an upcoming party at Marcy's house. CB goes to Beethoven's practice room to listen to his music. CB then monologues over his dead dog which irritates Beethoven that in return, Beethoven tells CB about how he can't go through his day without someone bullying him in some sort, and tells CB that "messing around with me" means teasing and other sorts. CB makes a truce with Beethoven to reestablish their friendship. CB sits next to Beethoven while he plays, and then CB kisses Beethoven.

At the party, Matt calls Beethoven a fag again. CB comes to Beethoven's defense and kisses him again, this time in front of everyone. Outside, Beethoven demands an explanation of what happened. CB says he wanted to do that and in return, Beethoven kisses CB. A few days later, Matt, Tricia, Marcy and Van eat lunch together, and are all stunned at what happened. Matt vows to make Beethoven pay for "messing with best friend's head". CB goes to visit Van's sister, who was institutionalized for setting the Little Red-Haired Girl's hair on fire. CB tells her the whole story, also revealing that he and Beethoven had sex after the party.

While Beethoven is practicing, Matt comes in and harasses him for being in love with CB. Matt tells him to stay away from CB, or else. Beethoven says no and calls him by his old nickname, Pigpen. This angers Matt, who slams the piano top, breaking Beethoven's hands. Later on, the group has a talk about Beethoven, who committed suicide (Matt, meanwhile, was suspended from school for a week). CB is angered by this and berates them for not being sorry for him all these years. Later on, CB gets a letter from his pen pal. In the letter he tells him that he must keep strong, even in rough times. The letter mentions a boy "who plays piano just like friend" moved in near the pen pal, and mentions that "he's had a tough life, but things are better for him, now.", and that he found a dog who likes to sing along to the piano (like CB's dog did, alluding that Beethoven is now caring for CB's dog in the afterlife). CB cries over the letter, as it meant so much to his friend, dog, and himself. The letter is signed 'CS', an allusion to Peanuts creator Charles M. Schulz.