Carlos Alberto Valderrama (born November 30, 1977 in Bachaquero, Zulia State, Venezuela) was a Major League Baseball outfielder and right-handed batter who played in seven games for the San Francisco Giants in 2003.
During his brief time with the big club, Valderrama had one single in seven at bats, one stolen base, and fielded six chances flawlessly.
A former outfield prospect, Valderrama was hampered by injuries throughout a nine-year minor league career, playing in over 100 games only four times. He had a career average of .298 with 57 home runs, 334 RBI, 427 runs and 203 stolen bases in 729 games.
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“He doesn’t know a damn thing about China ... That’s what makes him an expert. He knows nothing about music, being tone deaf. That’s what makes him a musician ... And he’s batty in the head. That’s what makes him a philosopher.”
—William Carlos Williams (1883–1963)