A Mad Couple Well-Match'd - Synopsis

Synopsis

George Careless is a debauched young gentleman, the type of character who often appears in Caroline drama. Since rescuing his rich uncle Sir Anthony Thrivewell from an attempted robbery, Careless has enjoyed his uncle's patronage and financial support — though lately Sir Anthony has grown weary of rescuing his nephew from his "surfeits, wants, wounds, and imprisonments," as is threatening to cut the young man off. The matter is complicated by the fact that the elderly Sir Anthony married a young wife two years previously, but has yet to father a child with her, leaving his nephew Careless as the heir to his estates.

This backstory is delivered in the play's opening dialogue, between Careless and his servant Wat. Their conversation also touches upon the subject of Careless's mistress Phebe, a young woman whom Careless has seduced and maintained as his lover. Phebe had grown increasingly unhappy with her disreputable state, and longs for marriage; Careless does not. Phebe has appealed for help to a relative of hers, a London merchant named Tom Saleware. Saleware has a notorious reputation as a "wittol" — a complaisant cuckold: his wife Alicia Saleware sleeps with prominent men for social and financial advantage.

Among those men is Sir Anthony Thrivewell; the guilt-ridden old knight admits to his Lady that he had one sexual experience with Mistress Saleware, which cost him £100. Lady Thrivewell, a worldly woman, forgives her husband — but extracts a little revenge from Mistress Saleware: she buys goods at the Salewares' shop worth a hundred pounds and change, but pays only the change. Alicia Saleware is resentful over the trick, but has other matters to attend to: she is being courted by a licentious nobleman called Lord Lovely, who sends his follower, a young man called Bellamy, as his go-between. Their conversations reveal a noticeable measure of sexual tension, the suggestion being that young Bellamy, though naive and inexperienced, is interested in Alicia Saleware for himself. Alicia Saleware is shown conducting her flirtations under her husband's nose, while he refuses to acknowledge the facts before him.

Through the intervention of Sir Anthony's friend Mr. Saveall, Careless is welcomed back into Sir Anthony's graces, and the Thrivewell house, once again. As a way of reforming the nephew and restoring his fortune, Thrivewell and Saveall promote an arranged marriage between Careless and a wealthy young widow, Mistress Crostill. Careless sends her a letter to advance his suit, and at the same time writes a dismissive and insulting letter to Phebe; true to his name, however, he misdirects the two letters, so that Phebe receives the marriage proposal and Mrs. Crostil the insults. The widow, however, has a "humorous" and contrary personality (hence her name: she is always contrary, "cross still"):

"she has a violent humour to do, and not to do things oftentimes willfully against all good counsel or persuasion; she has the spirit of contradiction in her, and an unalterable resolution upon sudden intentions, a most incorrigible will she has, that will not bow nor break"

— as Mr. Saveall puts it. The rudeness and sexual bravado of Careless's "cross abusive letter" only attract the widow to him.

Careless is incorrigible himself: drunk, he makes sexual advances to Lady Thrivewell, offering to impregnate her with the heir that his uncle apparently cannot conceive. When his servant Wat protests Careless's callous treatment of Phebe and his general bad behavior, Careless beats him and fires him. Even when he's sober, Careless continues his pursuit of the Lady for sex, and the widow for marriage. Mrs. Crostil is a handful for him, however; Lord Lovely has proposed a marriage between her and young Bellamy, and in one comic scene Crostil merely repeats Careless's wooing to Bellamy verbatim, and repeats Bellamy's words back to Careless. Careless quickly develops a resentment toward Bellamy, and a suspicion of the young man's friendship with Lady Thrivewell.

Meanwhile, Alicia Saleware finds that Bellamy evades and frustrates her attempts to have sex with him. Offended, she decides to accuse him of trying to seduce her away from Lord Lovely. The play's entanglements come to a head in the final Act: Careless believes that he has seduced Lady Thrivewell and then been dismissed by her, and he exposes her to her husband. Lord Thrivewell is deeply distressed by the accusation, but Lady Thrivewell assures him that she can resolve him of her innocence. She reveals that she has played a version of the bed trick (so common in English Renaissance drama), and that the woman Careless mistook for Lady Thrivewell in the dark was actually his mistress Phebe. By this, the Lady has managed to teach a lesson to Careless, and also to her husband and his double standard of sexual behavior.

The accusations against young Bellamy, and all appearances of sexual misbehavior on his part (with Alicia Saleware or Lady Thrivewell or Mrs. Crostil), are negated when it is revealed that "he" is actually a young woman, disguised to safeguard her against sexual predators like Lord Lovely. Careless, exposed and disgraced, states that he will marry Phebe and sell tobacco for a living — but Lady Thrivewell has other ideas: she and other friends provide a dowry on which Phebe and Wat can marry and establish themselves. Lord Lovely promises to reform; Alicia Saleware is sent back to her husband to make something of her marriage, if she can. With all his other plots exposed, Careless admits that the robbery from which he once rescued Sir Anthony was a con-game, a trick arranged to earn the knight's gratitude. Yet despite all of his faults, Careless still attracts Mrs. Crostil; they decide to marry — two incorrigibles who deserve each other, a mad couple well matched.